by Mark C. Wallfisch

“Yes, my mother made it like that, and, in fact, her mother did, too,” Les told Michael.

“So it’s time for the madness to stop, right?” Michael replied.

“I’ll add a second vegetable dish — anything you want — but we definitely have to have the casserole with canned green beans and cream of mushroom soup,” Les countered.

“OK.  I got it.  But how about some real cranberries this year?” Michael asked.

Les’s eyes widened, and he said, “Oh, I love those little ridges.  They really mean Thanksgiving to me.  I’ll make a recipe I heard on NPR, too, but we’ve got to have the red cylinder with those ridges.”

When the guests had been invited and the menu set, Michael and Les were ready to get ready for Thanksgiving.  Michael did the grocery shopping. 

At Kroger, while buying the items that Les had specified, Michael cringed as he picked up the Del Monte French Style Green Beans, Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup, and Ocean Spray Jellied Cranberry Sauce.  He got everything on the list, checked out, put the groceries in the car, and headed home.

When he pulled up to the house, he saw a thief, a porch pirate, picking up an Amazon box at the front door.  Michael hopped out of the car and threw a can of cranberry sauce at the thief, hitting him in the head and knocking him out.

Michael called 911.  The police and an ambulance arrived.  After Michael told the officer what had happened, the officer chuckled and said, “I hate that cranberry stuff.”

Michael replied, “I did, too, until just now.”

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